that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
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I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
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You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
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