I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
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