I wish I only lived at night.
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
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