they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
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