She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
MASS TEXT: Next weekend I will be in town for St. Patty's day. There will be a bonfire and liqour olympics. We will have booze but in order to participate it is byob. Upon arrival everyone will be asked to sign a waiver. I am not responsible for liver failure, death, loss of clothing or memory, bites, scratches, hickies, pregnancies, or any other for of injury you may obtain while participating. There will be ridiculous amounts of green glitter, be prepared to puke it up. ALSO WEAR SOMETHING GREEN OR YOU WILL BE PENALIZED!! AUTOMATIC 5 SHOTS. HAPPY GAMING!!!
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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