I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
You should frame my arrest warrant.
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
Randomize