from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
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Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
I put an asterick after the names of people in my phone that I've fucked. Both as a form of bragging, and also so I can actually remember all their names.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
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