No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize