debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
Have you ever wanted to murder the Sun? To bring the life-giving fusion reactor to a bitter end because of the sheer agony it brings to your eyes as it keeps you awake. And for waking the birds. Fuck birds.
Randomize