So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
Randomize
