Walk of Shame. In a state park.
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
at one point last night, you were literally auctioning me off. "reeeally drunk hot girl ! we'll start the bidding at an ice cold corona. oh, we have a bidder! do i hear a shot of whiskey? going once, going twice.."
youre welcome
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
Randomize
