I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
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