there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
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