Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
Randomize
