I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
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