I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
Randomize
