i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
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