If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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