If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Walk of Shame today included voting.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
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