Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
Randomize
