Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
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