final count. 18 beers. 4 shots baileys. 2 shots vodka. 1 glass champagne. vomited in the yard after losing my phone in a field for 8 hours. Possibly played tag with myself
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Randomize
