Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
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