Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
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