Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
I should start prefacing bondage with girls saying "I know you've read 50 Shades, but there is a 33% you're gonna freakout and go home, while I jerk it alone"
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
