you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
I enjoy the company of your penis
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Randomize