im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
Randomize