Jerry, you need to find god
upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
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