You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
Randomize
