he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
Randomize