when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
"just because you look like a short version of scarlet johanson does not mean I would immediately fuck you" that was the single.most difficult thing to say. but seriously I don't want the roots of the whore tree anywhere near my junk.
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?