Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
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