mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
Randomize
