Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
Randomize
