I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
i need to put some appletini on your dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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