Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
Randomize
