So I went home with some chick last night... I'm not sue what's worse: not getting a nut at 5am, the condom breaking and not being replaced, feeling poo when I put my finger in her but, sleeping on a heroin mattress in her living room, her swine flu coughing fit at 7am or realizing she peed the matt at 10am. Actually it was probably the fact that she continuously told me she was the classiest girl in boulder.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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