is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
and i looked up. we had an audience...
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
I left you a really long drunk voicemail and I remember something about a bat
Randomize
