it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
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