Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
I still have a little drunk in my system
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
I should never have to text my best friend asking if she eloped again last night.
Randomize
