either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
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