margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
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