i barfeds in our rink
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
I'm gonna fight the coyote
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
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