i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
Randomize
