I puked a lego.
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
drunk me just left notes all around the apt to remind shitfaced me that i have mashed potatoes in the fridge. do not take them down if you come home before me.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
Found the puke drawer
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
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