The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
I just got hit by a car and apologized to the driver. I asked him if he was okay.
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
I told him he was a man of science and that he should conduct experiments on my tits to see how they stay up. I need you to hold onto my larynx when I'm drunk.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
