Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
Listen, Pinot Grigio got me pregnant. It can get you a boyfriend.
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
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