As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
Randomize