The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
Flying into Chicago for a few days, getting re-deployed in September, we should probably fuck
Kristina got the same text from you just now, she's sitting next to me, how many people did you send this to?
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
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