You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
You can't just call animal control when you're drunk because there is a bug in the shower.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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