I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
Randomize
